I see them

I see them walking the streets with their eyes on the ground, following the shadow that the sun casts from behind their backs. I see them walking to the destination determined by something else than their hearts. I see them walking in the dark because they are afraid of the light. I see them crashing a snail on the ground when they run to catch the bus and riding through the town without seeing who is on the bus with them or who is driving. I see them spending eight ours of their day in an unhappy place, smiling the polite smile without the heart, the smile they were taught at age six. I see them turning their eyes away when they see something ugly, something poor or something disturbing. I see them walking away without helping. 

I see them being cold and calculative. I see them being strict about the unwritten rules. I see their eyes filled with emptiness and hollowness, I feel the cold breeze when they walk past me. I see them avoiding their neighbors. I see them confused when a stranger says hi to them. I see them being ready to feed you to the sharks. I see them concerned about protecting what is ‘theirs’ and not giving a shit about what is ‘someone else’s’. I see them being caught in the past and not letting go. I see them constantly reminding themselves about the bad. 
I see them trying to unhappy the happiness. I see them being oblivious. 

I see them trashing the nature, I see them spending millions in a piece of road that is unnecessary. 
I see them talking behind someone’s back and acting up in front of them.

 I see them changing their opinion without ever truly having one. I see them lying, cheating and avoiding the truth. I see them going in to the doctors office for a headache and walking away with a pill that has a headache as a side-effect. I see them going into houses instead of homes. I see them waiting for someone else to tell them what to do or where to go next. I see them getting an education they don't want. I see them stabbing the back of the friend they are hugging. I see them wearing the same shade of gray. I see them making empty promises and being sad when a promise is broken to them.

 I see them blackmailing and playing games. I see them holding grudge. I see them trying to blame someone else for their mistakes. I see them making a big deal out of nothing and turning a big deal into nothing. 

I see them shouting and not listening. 

I see them gossiping. I see them not being tolerant. I see them being alone. I see them not understanding the connection between mind, body and nature. I see them getting back at each other and not forgiving. I see them faking. You see them as being shy; I see them as thinking they’re just better off without you. I see them having the negative set of mind. I see them thinking ‘it could be worse so I better settle for this’. I see them being angry at the traffic jam caused by themselves. I see them buying everything they want – clothes, power, friends, love ones. I see them not knowing what love is. 

I see them. I see them and it scares me for I am them. 

I see them in me. I am You. You are me. 

If I don’t change, will You?

The power of giving (book by Azim Jamal & Harvey McKinnon)

Giving creates a symbiotic relationship; it benefits both parties. The recipients benefit from your gift. And you benefit personally by virtue of having been a giver. Sometimes it is easy to see the immediate benefits to those you help. Other times, the ultimate benefits of your action may occur many years in the future. What ever your gift, your time, your money, or effort will have a positive impact. The other side of the equation is the benefits to you. They may be visible and immediate, or they may be intangible and delayed. You may not even recognize them as benefits. You may gain a tax deduction. You may feel great about your ability to help. You may receive heartfelt thanks. What ever form the benefits take, giving brings meaning to your life. When you give, you have a chance to make an incredible impact during and often beyond your life. And when you give without expecting a return, you reap even more benefits.

True giving begins with love. Love is the most powerful force in the world, and when we love, we are in touch with our basic and most fundamental human need. Love is something all people need, no matter their background, culture or faith. Many people grow up in difficult circumstances, and almost everyone at one time or another has suffered emotional wounds, dashed hopes, or the loss of love. All people are complicated, and as they try to make their way in the world, sometimes they offend you, hurt you, ignore you, or lack compassion for you. You have probably caused the same emotional pain to others, sometimes unintentionally, sometimes not. This is why giving the gifts of compassion, understanding, and unconditional love is so important. It helps to break the negative cycle in relationships and leads to a revival of love and commitment because when people receive love, they learn to give love. Almost every week you'll hear the word love used in ways that distort its real meaning and power. Remember; "love is a verb." It's not passive. When you give love, you receive love. Real love is is an example of how giving and receiving are so intertwined. True love is selfless. Its free and liberated. Love is timeless, and deep love continues to live even after our death. Forgiving people for past mistakes and hurts is also a way to express love, and forgiveness is a wonderful thing to give. Like you, other people are only imperfect humans.

There is much sadness in the world, but there are also unlimited ways to make a positive difference. You can gain tremendous benefits from giving. Among these benefits are new friends, a feeling of security, better health, happiness and a sense of pride. You are at your best when you make a difference and contribute. You need only so much as an individual to be happy. Therefore, to live your potential and create abundance, you need to do something larger than yourself - thus the need to give. What can you give?

* Love

* Laughter

* Knowledge

*Leadership

* Hope

* Life

* Time

* Money

* Skills

* Health

* Touch

* Attention

*Advice

Being kind is the simplest way to become who we really are. To find yourself, lose yourself in the service of others. 

All or Nothing

First I thought all or nothing is a bad thing and life sould not be a battle like that. But it is... It is all or nothing.. There is no half-way freedom - you're either a prisoner or a free man. Either you eat or you starve to death. Either you love or you don't. You're life is about you, what makes you happy, you follow that path. No one ever goes to a place where they know they can't be happy or where they get hurt, you avoid it. When you do what you want and what you love, you do it with all or nothing mindset. You make it happen, you dedicate yourself to that, you don't just let it go, you want to fight for it. To me, All or nothing is not using the ESC-button when it doesn't work, it's the opposite. It's putting yourself on the line, jumping off the edge, taking the leap. You have so little time here so why hold back and play it safe. "I want to, but.." well, then no you don't. If you want to, if you love, you make it happen. There are no "but´s" in doing, doubting isn't part of wanting to make it happen and dedicating yourself to your life. 

Live your life with everything you have. Take the leap. Go and say you love someone if you do, quit your job and travel if you want to, move out of that place where you're not happy with yourself, say yes or no - lose the i don't knows and maybes when it's about 'do you want to', there will always be a way to make it happen, open your eyes and see it. And yes, you're going to make mistakes but you are going to do those anyways, playing it safe doesn't take them away. Remember that you are the one who loses the game if you don't truly play it. Play your game, live your life. Don't fall in to the pit of misery, unhappiness and decisions made for you. You make yourself happy, no one else can do that for you. You can be happy with someone but the ultimate happiness is you in you.  

Tuesdays with Morrie part 1. Life & Love

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and to let it come in. Let it come in. We think we don’t deserve love, we think if we let it in we’ll become too soft. But a wise man named Levine said it right. Love is the only rational act.

Love is how you stay alive, even after you’re gone. Being fully present means you should be with the person you’re with. I am not thinking about something we said last week. I am not thinking of what’s coming up this Friday. I am not thinking about doing another show, I am not thinking about what medications I’m taking. I am talking to you. I am thinking about you. Part of the problem is that everyone is in such a hurry. People haven’t found meaning in their lives, so they’re running all the time looking for it. They think the next car, the next house, the next job. Then they find those things empty too and they keep running. Once you start running, it's hard to slow yourself down. It is so important to find loving relationship with someone because so much of the culture does not give you that. 

There is no formula to relationships. They have to negotiated in loving ways, with room for both parties, what they want and what they need, what they can do and what their life is like. In business people negotiate to win. They negotiate to get what they want. 

Love is different. Love is when you are concerned about someone elses’s situation as you are about your own.

Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn’t. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted. A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle. 

 

Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too – even when you’re in the dark. 

Even when you’re falling.

 

Learn to detach. Don’t cling to things, because everything is impermanent. Detachment doesn’t mean you don’t let the experience penetrate you. On the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. That’s how you are able to leave it. Take any emotion – love for a woman, or grief for a loved one, fear and pain from a deadly illness. If you hold back on the emotions – if you don’t allow yourself to go all the way through them – you can never get to being detached, you’re too busy being afraid. You’re afraid of the pain, you’re afraid of the grief. You’re afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails. But by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, you experience them fully and completely. You know what pain is. You know what love is. You know what grief is. Wash yourself with the emotion. It won’t hurt you. It will only help. If you let the fear inside, if you pull it on like a familiar shirt, then you can say to yourself, all right, it’s just fear, I don’t have to let it control me. I see it for what it is. 

Forgive yourself before you die. Then forgive others. You can’t get stuck on the regrets of what should’ve happened.